Let the girls do the dancing at the strip club, or you might get shot in the ass

This guy got what he deserved — but frankly, we’d all have been better off if the security guards had killed him instead of just shooting him in the ass:

HOUSTON — Two security guards returned fire at a gunman in the parking lot of a southwest Houston topless club early this morning, wounding him twice, police said.

According to Houston police, a man got on stage at Players Club in the 9300 block of Bissonnet near U.S. 59 and began dancing with a woman, prompting his ejection, police said. He went to his vehicle to retrieve a gun and fired at three guards who had followed him out.

Two guards fired an undetermined number of shots, and the man was hit in the side and in the buttocks. He was taken to nearby Memorial Hermann Hospital Southwest, but his condition wasn’t immediately available.

Rule #1 at the Club is never, ever, under any circumstances get up on stage with the girls (unless it’s your birthday or bachelor party and they invite you up on the stage). Oh, and if you act the fool and get thrown out — please try to remember that the goons that security at a Club is ALWAYS going to be armed.