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Archive for the 'Gratuitous Traffic Whoring' Category

Heather Locklear is Too Hot to Have to Drive Herself (Drunk)

Posted by Robbie Cooper on September 29th, 2008 | Trackback

But if Ms. Locklear continues to hit the drugs like that, she’ll end up going down hill quicker than a fat kid going down on a piece of cake.

Did David Win American Idol?

Posted by Robbie Cooper on May 22nd, 2008 | Trackback

I admit that the show was on at our house last night — but I was not watching it. I was writing while the television blared in the background. I swear the dogs like watching that crap.

Danica Patrick Wins First IndyCar Race

Posted by Robbie Cooper on April 20th, 2008 | Trackback

Patrick risked becoming the Anna Kournikova of the driving world — known more for her looks than her ability to win (Kournikova had a remarkable career in doubles matches, but never won a big singles event).

Vladimir Putin Leaves Wife for 24-year Old Russian Gymnast

Posted by Robbie Cooper on April 17th, 2008 | Trackback

I’m sure it has nothing to do with the circus-like freak sex. I’m sure Vladi really, really loves her.

Heidi Montag — Hot “Feminist Hero” Endorses John McCain

Posted by Robbie Cooper on April 2nd, 2008 | Trackback

So Heidi Montag is good looking and smart…no wonder the libtards are all flocking to tear her down.

She likes civilized pursuits, like dining at exclusive restaurants (such as the Governor’s Mansion kitchen?), sampling fine wines, and apparently a little barebacking.

Katie Rees: Former Dethroned Miss Nevada Assaults Police Officer

Posted by Robbie Cooper on February 6th, 2008 | Trackback

Now that is one fugly mug shot. Gives beauty queen-turned felon Kumari Fulbright a run for her money for “Worst Beauty Queen Mugshot”.

American Idol Season 7 — Finalists Revealed

Posted by Robbie Cooper on January 25th, 2008 | Trackback

A photographer from SGVTribune captured 16 American Idol contestants filming a Ford commercial. And it looks like all the suspected ringers are amongst the 16 of 24 finalists

American Idol Bruce Dickson — I’ve Never Kissed a Girl Before

Posted by Robbie Cooper on January 17th, 2008 | Trackback

The kid kept going on and on about how he had never kissed a girl. Or never been with a girl. I couldn’t help but think, “Yeah, but how many boys have you kissed. And was your father one of them.”

Is Carmen Kontur-Gronquist the Buffest Mayor in the US?

Posted by Robbie Cooper on January 7th, 2008 | Trackback

Frankly, she looks fantastic. The people of Arlington should be proud of how fit and healthy their mayor is.

Kumari Fulbright: A New (Low) Standard in Mug Shots

Posted by Robbie Cooper on January 2nd, 2008 | Trackback

Amazing what some makeup and a good cameraman/airbrush artist can do for a girl…

Kumari Fulbright: Law Student, Beauty Queen, Kidnapper, and Robber

Posted by Robbie Cooper on January 1st, 2008 | Trackback

I’m sure a lot of guys wouldn’t mind being tied up by Ms. Fulbright…but the “knife in the ear” and the “gun to the head” might be a bit too much for even most masochists.

Challenging Ezra Klein to a Charity Boxing Match

Posted by Robbie Cooper on October 11th, 2007 | Trackback

I’d like to challenge Ezra — not to a debate in which there could be no winner — but to a Charity Boxing Match. That’s right — man-against-man (though Ezra usually prefers to pick fights with women) in a ring with gloves. You can even wear headgear.

Ashley Force: The Hottest Athlete

Posted by Robbie Cooper on September 23rd, 2007 | Trackback

According to the first annual “Hottest Athlete” poll on AOL Sports, the hands down winner is NHRA driver Ashley Force